Justice Roe Williams seeks out tough conversations
Justice Roe Williams has superpowers.
"I have the ability to get the unusual suspects in a room talking to each other and sharing with each other. And at the end of that time, they've made a commitment to learn more and engage," explained the activist. It's "one of my superpowers," he added.
Williams hosts a discussion group called "Beyond Masculinity" both virtually and in-person in Boston. The group brings together cisgender, transgender, and non-binary people to connect authentically and to think about toxic masculinity. In many ways, the discussion groups are an extension of the activism that Williams has been doing his entire life.
"I'm a questioning person. That's who I am," Williams said. "Even when I was a child, my mom would say to me that she could never answer my questions. I had really deep questions and she would wonder why I was thinking that way."
"I'm a very curious person. I want to know: what made you do that? What were you thinking? I need to get below the surface. And I think that's what makes me a good facilitator: I'm able to pinpoint things and ask the question that allows us to feel comfortable digging a little bit deeper."
Williams grew up in New Jersey and eventually moved to Boston. He began his activism in earnest in college when he started advocating on behalf of political prisoners, and his penchant for asking questions stuck with him, even as he navigated different careers and causes.
"No matter where I am, I invest in creating a space where we can be free and authentic and connect in powerful ways," he explained.
"I don't know what it is about me: I worked at the window factory, and somehow someway I got pulled into organizing... I've worked at Fenway Health, I've done warehouse work... I started working [in] fitness and decided to keep organizing within the fitness industry." (Williams eventually co-published a book titled Deconstructing the Fitness-Industrial Complex about making fitness more inclusive for everybody).
A philosophy that unites much of his work is about being authentic and seeking out tough conversations.
Take his Beyond Masculinity discussion group. "I'm able to pull in all those who identify on the masculine spectrum," Williams explained, "so those who identify as cis, those who identify as non-binary, those who identify as a trans man or trans-masculine or just a man." The topics are serious: they talk about experiencing emotions other than anger and about having relations without dominating over other people. But it's not a lecture.
"Everyone feels that we are trying to be in this circle and learn from each other," he said. "At times, we're going to triggered and traumatized. We have to hold ourselves accountable in that trauma, to acknowledge that trauma is from something that happened in the past, and it's a remembrance. It's not always a red flag, it's actually a remembrance so that we can move through that trauma differently."
"In the practice of facilitating circles and these very challenging conversations, I have to translate for people," he added. "I have to give people an understanding that this was traumatic, this person has been through it, while at the same time I'm helping the person who was triggered to polish their armor and to remain in that space, and to remain open."
Williams compared his work as a facilitator to his work in fitness. "If we're moving without conflict, and we're not creating any challenges to our bodies, are we getting stronger? Are we growing? No. Struggle creates growth. If you're struggling with that weight, you're going to get stronger."
"You can't build with each other authentically without that conflict. Conflict we view as a negative thing, but it's actually a positive thing. I wouldn't want everyone to look like me. I wouldn't lot a lot of mirror images of me. Just people being like: 'oh, I want to do what Justice says.' That's so boring."
"What do they say: you never know what you had until it's gone? It's the truth, because we don't honor and acknowledge what every individual brings to a circle, to a community, to a collective. Even the person that frustrates you, they bring something to that collective."
The discussion groups Williams facilitates don't end with everyone thinking alike, and he says that's OK. "We are able to come to some form of agreement," he explained. "I don't say we are all in acceptance of the information we received, but we come to an agreement to continue the discussion, to continue to share, to continue to be exposed."
"It's not easy," Williams said of his work as a facilitator. "How I do it is by being authentic and honest, and by facilitating that space in a way that everyone sees that we are trying to be in the circle and learn from each other."
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